“Never Enough: The Neuroscience and Experience of Addiction” written by Judith Grisel (2019), a behavioural neuroscientist and psychology professor at Bucknell University, was my first introduction to the science behind addiction. Beyond being scientific, “Never Enough” draws on Grisel’s personal experiences with alcoholism. Her addiction and recovery journey led her to a lifelong career in addiction research and a mission to raise awareness of the epidemic of addiction. 

Grisel’s book deeply humanizes individuals affected by addiction. These stories not only contextualize the science of the brain’s reward system, but also tie a person to this knowledge.

The following is an excerpt from the book that stuck with me:

“However, it was there that I began to realize that my initial intuitions about alcohol and other drugs were precisely upside down. Rather than provide a solution to my problems with living, they had chipped away at every prospect until only the barest shred of life remained. 

I’d sought wellness and became sick; fun, but lived in a constant state of anxious dread; freedom, and was enslaved. In just ten years, my sources for solace had totally betrayed me, carving out a canyon deep and unlivable. 

Drugs were destroying every aspect of my life, yet my days revolved around self-administering until I passed out.”

As she grappled with an addiction she has had since she was 12, Grisel describes in this excerpt the never-ending paradox of addiction and recovery. She got hooked on a drug that made her feel good, but destroyed her life. When she attempted to recover, she fell ill to the withdrawals. What had seemed like a solution and escape to her problems in her life, only made the problems worse and inescapable. 

In this excerpt alone, Grisel successfully illustrates the experience that most outsiders only see the symptoms of, but never live through. She accomplishes scientific communication through sparking empathy, and bridges the invisible boundary between patients and academia. Not only is her story so relevant, but her journey to success is inspiring to me – an aspiring researcher.

To learn more about Judith Grisel and her work, click here.

Contributing Writer: Serena Phung

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Feature Image Credit: Photo by Bermix Studio on Unsplash