Bella Mayo is a twenty year old poet and actress, who released her first poetry collection called My Greenhouse in 2021. She began to write this poetry book at the mere age of 15, using it as a way to express her feelings. 

This is Mayo’s debut collection and looks at the stages of being in a relationship for the first time. From the stage of just having a crush and looking forward to the potential future, to the ups and downs of being in a romantic relationship. The collection ends with Bella Mayo looking back at her experience and reminiscing on her relationship. 

A poem in particular that stands out from the collection is “My Hurtful One”. It looks at the stage where one is regretting the break up and wondering if it would be easier just to go back to the person that caused them the pain in the first place. This is evident in the following lines…

Sometimes I think I’d rather be fighting than 

be this. 

Sometimes I think I’d rather be crying because of

you than crying without you.

Sometimes I even wish you were yelling at me

again, because then at least I’d know I’m on

your mind.

It’s twisted, I know, but it’s true.

It’s the feeling of wanting everything to just go back to how it was. 

At times it almost feels like the hour of laughter

outweighs the twenty-three of tearful eyes. 

When you are with someone you become comfortable. Some become so comfortable that they would rather endure pain brought on by their partner than deal with the pain of being alone. It is easy to look back at the few good memories and forget the plentiful bad memories. Bella Mayo did a great job at capturing what a whirlwind first relationship feels like. Going through the crush stage, to fights, breaks, rekindles, and the final break up. 

Check out the collection here.

Image Credits:
Feature Image: Everton Vila, On Unsplash. Creative Commons