Smaller Than This

Smaller Than This

TRIGGER WARNING: Eating Disorders

Every 62 minutes, someone dies as a direct result of an eating disorder (ED). EDs are complex mental illnesses with physical manifestations. Different factors may contribute to the development of an eating disorder, including genetics, psychological and cultural factors. Eating disorders can be life-threatening illnesses, but treatable. Many people who have have an eating disorder feel shame from their symptoms or the way they eat and are secretive about their eating habits. Therefore, it is important to be informed of symptoms so you can seek help if you are struggling with an ED or you can help a loved one who may be struggling.  The National Eating Disorder Information Centre (NEDIC) has useful resources, referrals and support to individuals who are affected by eating disorders. 

In this song, singer Sara Kays sings about one’s daily  struggle with an eating disorder and their struggle with their body image and self-esteem. Her words depict the symptoms that many people with anorexia nervosa experience. She talks about restricting food (“I feel like I failure if I don’t skip breakfast and lunch”) and body image issues that many females with anorexia nervosa have (“I’m chasing a body I know that I’ll never outrun”).  

I wake up early, sometimes at 5:30 to run
My mom got too worried, I had to tell her it was fun
Oh, I feel like a failure if I don’t skip breakfast and lunch
I’m chasing a body I know that I’ll never outrun

‘Cause I’ll always wish I was smaller than this
And I just can’t quit pulling at my skin
Oh, I’m scared that I’m never gonna like
How I look and I wish I knew why
‘Cause I’ll always wish I was smaller than this

I’ll set a goal for myself and I’ll try to work hard
I’ll reach it but swear I look just like I did from the start
I know that it’s not true but I feel like I’m the only one
Who’s chasing a body I know that I’ll never outrun”

You can listen to the full song here.

Image Credits:
Feature Image: Hala Al-Asadi, On Unsplash, Creative Commons

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